DVD Reviews - November 3rd

THE HAPPENING

It may appear that M. Night Shyamalan is intent on seeing his career sink without a trace, but did he really have to try and drag down Mark Wahlberg with him. Now I'm a big fan of Marky Mark, despite a number of flops he has shown in the likes of 'The Departed' and 'Boogie Nights' his excellent acting capabilities, yet I can't help but worry for the direction of his career. 'The Happening' is a monumental flop, not only is it badly scripted, badly acted, possesses a terrible title and is frankly directionless but it's sanctimonious central message is too tough to swallow. The entirety of Shyamalan's wafer-thin plot simply concerns mother nature turning on us humans and releasing a toxin that makes us kill ourselves. This - as it is practically rammed down the audiences throats - is a warning that if we don't treat the environment better then it will come back to haunt us. It's less of a lesson and more of a stern telling off.   

Don't worry if you think I've given away the whodunnit facet of the story just now because it's abundantly clear from the word go, and don't hold out any hope for a trademark Shyamalan twist because there's none forthcoming. Perhaps I was unfair on the writer/director before as admittedly he has made some great movies in the past, but recently things seem to be going from bad to worse. 'The Happening' has somewhat of a B-movie feel and it creates all the tension of the worst B-movies. The script that has a problem with stating the bleeding obvious facilitates the limp atmosphere, Wahlberg's "oh no" speaks volumes for how the rest of us are feeling. Both Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel come off very badly, but it's hard to judge them too harshly considering what they are given to work with. It's hard to put into words how truly shocking this is, but thankfully it's bad enough that at least it may raise a few unintentional laughs.

Verdict: It may be happening, but you're going to wish it hadn't.

DVD Reviews - October 27th

IRON MAN

Robert Downey Jr has made one hell of a comeback, after drink and drugs had seemingly killed his career he has somehow not only returned to previous heights but seems to have emerged as Hollywood's golden boy. After working his way back to the top with a series of impressive supporting roles in the likes of 'Zodiac' and 'A Scanner Darkly', 2008 has seen Downey Jr steal the show in 'Tropic Thunder', line up the title role in Guy Ritchie's upcoming 'Sherlock Holmes' and most notably taking centre stage in 'Iron Man'. He plays Tony Stark, playboy billionaire and arms dealer extraordinaire who is kidnapped during a demonstration in Afghanistan. With a piece of shrapnel embedded in his chest and an electromagnet stopping it from penetrating his heart, Stark builds an iron suit to escape his captors and makes his way home. Once back he embarks on developing a more complex suit whilst unknown to him the grip he holds on his company and his life are under threat from an unlikely foe.

Although 'Iron Man' struggles to hide that it is little more than an origin story and the birth of a franchise, it does a near perfect job of establishing character and purpose for the (three already announced) sequels. Downey Jr is a revelation in the lead and has created one of the best alter egos in Tony Stark that the superhero genre has seen. Stark's charisma is undeniably what makes 'Iron Man' distinguish itself from the crowd, the supporting performances from Gwyneth Paltrow as Pepper Pots and Jeff Bridges as Obadiah Stone act as the solid base upon which he is allowed to form. Story-wise there is nothing particularly ground-breaking, Iron Man's origin is compelling but once the suit is completed the thrust is lost and the final act is merely a series of crashes and bangs to shoehorn in the obligatory big fight climax. Up until then events are nothing short of gripping and it's fortunate that the film was made with the sequels in mind, as they have the potential to eradicate memories of the weak ending with the foundations that have been laid. In fact, the weakest link on this occasion, Terrence Howard, has been replaced by Don Cheadle for the 2010 follow up so there's every reason to be excited about the next chapter.

Verdict: A sturdy start for a franchise that looks set to only get better, as long as Downey Jr maintains the high standard set.


THE EDGE OF LOVE

Scripted by Sharman MacDonald, mother of the film's star Keira Knightley, 'The Edge of Love' is a film loosely based on the real life events of poet Dylan Thomas (Matthew Rhys). Set during the second World War, events are sparked by Thomas running back into his childhood sweetheart Vera Phillips (Knightley) and it seems the two still have feelings for each other. However, Thomas is now married to wife Caitlin (Sienna Miller) who, despite some early frostiness, becomes friends with Vera. This friendly rivalry is nothing compared to the conflict that arises between Thomas and soldier William (Cillian Murphy), who marries Vera before he's deployed abroad. It's a tale ultimately about the relationships between the four, with romance, mistrust and jealousy at the core.

The quality in performance of the four leads is staggeringly diverse, Knightley is superb and her Welsh accent is spot on, Rhys does a fine job portraying a brooding bastard of a poet, Murphy is dull and droll albeit in a role that allows him to do little more while Miller is shockingly bad and frankly shown up by the rest of the cast. Whether her accent was supposed to be English, Welsh or Irish seems destined to remain a mystery, however, the role was originally scheduled to be played by Lindsay Lohan so it may be the case that Miller's presence represents the lesser of two evils. The film's early dreamy vibe is enticing and draws you into the life of the poet and his friends, but later scenes in Wales seem dreary and the story peters out as it becomes clear that the characters lack the depth to carry such a feeling-heavy film.

Verdict: Less about Dylan Thomas than his friends and acquaintances, and none are well constructed enough to care too much about.

DVD Reviews - October 20th

HORTON HEARS A WHO

The team who crafted the 'Ice Age' films have this time turned their hand to the Dr. Seuss story in which Horton the elephant (Jim Carrey) discovers that there are tiny people living on a spec. Horton takes it upon himself to put the spec in a safe place and save the little Whos of Who-ville. Unfortunately for Horton and the Whos he faces trouble from a domineering kangaroo who claims that Horton is 'encouraging the children to have an imagination'. With a strong supporting voice cast including Seth Rogen and Steve Carell, and cameos from the likes of Amy Poehler, Jonah Hill, Jaime Pressly and Isla Fisher, it's certainly a star-studded event.

The vibrant animation creates a perfect blend of CG magic whilst staying true to the book's original illustrations, and though it may not be the best around in a market dominated by Dreamworks and Pixar, it hits all the right notes for a Dr. Seuss adaptation. It's pretty solid throughout and is bound to please the kids with a high laugh count and there's also the odd chuckle to be raised for the older viewer (Will Arnett's Vlad is a particular treat). Although the plot may be slightly contrived there's a moral behind it which is bound to speak to the younger viewer, maybe not as strongly however as in the original story. The ad hoc narration is weak and proves (as with 'The Grinch' and 'The Cat in the Hat') that Dr. Seuss works better on the page than it does on the screen, but regardless, it's twee and fun and a pleasng experience all round.

Verdict: Perfect for the small folk and bearable for anyone older and taller.



Also out on DVD this week is WANTED The review can be accessed on the main page by clicking here.

DVD Reviews - October 13th

SUPERHERO MOVIE

It's got to the stage with the so-called 'spoof' movies where it's simply a case of how bad they're going to be, and if one isn't truly terrible it's actually a pleasant surprise. 'Superhero Movie' is possibly one of the best spoofs I've seen in recent years, but that's not saying an awful lot. Don't be fooled by the title, this is not a spoof of the superhero genre, more accurately it's a direct parody of the original Spiderman. There's a single jab at X-Men, Batman Begins and Fantastic Four respectively, but other targets are few and far between. Not that the Spiderman observations are too sharp either, most are just memorable scenes recreated with a bit of slapstick thrown in.

One thing must be made very clear, David Zucker makes a far better spoof than his main competitors (Freidberg and Seltzer), but even so, it's hard to make much worse. Zucker at least largely steers clear of the offensive, save a horrendously inappropriate series of gags at the expense of Stephen Hawking. Unbelievably, some twenty years ago Zucker was teaming up with Leslie Nielsen to make the likes of Airplane and The Naked Gun, and perhaps that's what makes the pairings' latest output all the more depressing. It's as if Hollywood has lost the page in their dictionary where the word 'spoof' is described, and on occasions the phrase 'good taste'.

Verdict: Better than the other spoofs out there, but still terrible in it's own right.

THE RUINS

Some horrors rely heavily on gore and shock tactics to fill the scare quota whilst others depend more on escalating the tension and suspense to keep you on the edge of your seats. With 'The Ruins', relatively unknown director Carter Smith blends a bit of both in this years second most 'it was the plants what dunnit' talked about film. Thankfully this is nowhere near as bad as Shayamalan's 'The Happening', in fact, it's not too shabby at all. Initially things look bleak, four holiday-making (good-looking) teens make their way into the wilderness to look for someone who has gone missing and predictably things start to go a bit wrong. No marks for originality then, but as they say, it's all in the execution.

Save a few gory moments, 'The Ruins' rarely goes for the easy scare, as events slowly unfold the threat surrounding the surprisingly likable foursome escalates and the sense of desperation becomes all too clear. A fantastic central location works well as an arena in which to the effectively quarantine the group whilst despite some dodgy (at times unintentionally amusing) SFX, the plant-life growing throughout the temple provides a genuinely formidable threat. The end, admittedly, is a bit of a let down, but a darker and much improved alternate ending is available on the DVD.

Verdict: Don't be put off by the man-eating plants premise, all that sounds ridiculous is remedied by some smart and capable film-making.

Also out on DVD this week is THE INCREDIBLE HULK. The review can be accessed on the main page by clicking here.

DVD Reviews - August 25th

AWAKE

Hayden Christensen and Jessica Alba at the top of a film’s billing is hardly going to inspire confidence...but then again, every so often even the weakest of actors can make a good motion picture. This is most certainly not one of those occasions. Rich boy Clay Beresford (Christensen) is suffering from a condition that requires a heart transplant, during his surgery he finds himself fully conscious but paralysed. Supposedly to escape from the pain he has an out of body experience during which he sets about unravelling a plot to end his life. So that's the utterly ridiculous plot, and when coupled with some inept acting, preposterous science, a twist that everyone can see coming and some indefensible storytelling devices then there's very little to left to like save Alba's good looks.

To call this film unrealistic is an understatement, the only believable plot point in amongst the twaddle is that someone would want to kill Hayden Christensen. When the surgery scene arrives a voiceover takes over, as Clay screams in pain you have to stop and wonder who is having the more painful experience, you or him? What 'Awake' does achieve is a good few laughs, after all it's hard not to laugh at something this poor. But then again, is it really funny that there are people making money from presuming that audiences will just eat up this garbage? To be fair, it doesn't start out all that badly but that's the only semi-compliment I can muster. It's a thriller that lacks suspense and frankly that's unforgivable.

Verdict: A film as bad as it looks and as painful as it sounds.

DVD Reviews - August 18th

LARS AND THE REAL GIRL

A far cry from your traditional rom-com, 'Lars and the Real Girl' focuses on the relationship between Lars (Ryan Gosling) with his new girlfriend Bianca (a life-size, anatomically correct doll). Now clearly Lars isn't all there, he struggles to communicate with even his closest family and after when he orders Bianca from a website he treats her like a real person. His family become worried for his mental health and under the rouse of Bianca being ill, manage to take Lars to therapy sessions. The premise could easily lend itself to a smutty comedy but what presents itself is more sentimental fare, in the most offbeat and quirky way possible.

Ryan Gosling is fantastic in the lead role but it's about there the plaudits must stop. It's quite obvious that the filmmakers' intentions are all well placed, what's being attempted is admirable and you dearly want it to work. But it's all too twee, all too sweet, all to pure...and it really does not work. Lars' family and the local community show great understanding towards Lars, they play along with his madness and along the way we are shown how they grow with him. Sadly, this would just never happen, people are not that accepting and life is not filled with all the 'cute' moments that filter through Lars' world. What is attempted to be sentiment just comes off as weird, and just how the audience is supposed to accept that there is a 'real girl' with an interest in Lars, I will never know.

Verdict: Maybe it's a British thing, but on this side of the pond it just doesn't sit right.

LEATHERHEADS

It's really unsurprising that when you throw together an actor as interesting to watch as George 'charisma' Clooney and an actress as tedious as Renee Zellweger that what you get is fairly average. The film's plot revolves around the fledgling years of professional American Football in the US and one of it's main stars. Loosely based on real events and real players, Dodge Connolly (Clooney) brings war hero cum college football star Carter Rutherford (John Krasinski) to his team the Duluth Bulldogs, intending to use his fame to save the team. But reporter Lexie Littleton (Zellweger) throws a spanner in the works as she is set the task of investigating Rutherford's war heroics, whilst also attracting the affections of both Rutherford and Connolly.

If you're not interested in the NFL or sport in general it's not too much of a problem, it's unlikely to alienate you as in the hands of Clooney the game sequences are more fun than serious. But perhaps that is where the film has missed a trick. It's not a sports film, it's not a comedy, it's not a drama, it's a little bit of a lot of genres, it's a little bit dull. There are three plot threads, a romance lacking chemistry, a scandal which you'd rather stay uncovered and ball games of which you don't care about the outcome. It's just about watchable thanks mainly to Clooney (a man who probably sweats beads of charm) and a strong performance from The Office US star Krasinski despite a dour Zellweger and a weak script virtually neutralising their efforts.

Verdict: The various ingredients could be used to make stronger separate films, but together they're not the most appetising recipe.

MEET THE SPARTANS

The filmmakers know it's bad, the actors know it's bad, the critics know it's bad, the audience knows it's bad...so how on Earth does a film this diabolically bad make $85million. If there was a plot of which to speak of I'd be happy to explain it to you, but there isn't. What unfolds during the agonising 84 minutes is simply an overlong and unfunny riff on the fact that there was a slight homoerotic undercurrent present in 300. Because this one observation is hardly enough to fill a movie (although they do try), the cinematic antichrists Jason Freidberg and Aaron Seltzer feel the need to poke fun at any popular film or celebrity of the past six months. Hilarious!

If you buy this DVD or go watch this at the cinema you are simply encouraging them to make more, so please don't. Their latest output 'Disaster Movie' is likely to be just as bad, avoid it please at all costs. It's not like they're even putting any effort in, the lookalike celebrity's always arrive to a line such as "look, it's Britney Spears" or "Lindsay Lohan, what are you doing here", because otherwise you simply wouldn't know who the actress was supposed to be. The gags are repeated and even explained afterwards just in case you didn't get it the first time. Not only is it not funny, it's offensive to the celebrities it targets and an insult to it's audience's intelligence. If any film make's Sex and the City look inspirational, it's this. I don't like it, can you tell?

Verdict: Less fun than masturbating with a cheese grater.

DVD Reviews - August 11th

IN BRUGES

I have a theory that I'd like to put forward, and that is that everything immediately becomes funnier when said in an Irish accent. My theory bodes well for Martin McDonagh's comedy 'In Bruges', his first full length feature following Oscar winning short he directed, 'Six Shooter'. It follows two hitmen, Ray (Colin Farrell) and Ken (Brendan Gleeson) who are sent to hide out in Bruges by boss Harry (Ralph Fiennes) following a hit gone awry for Ray. What follows is a deviously dark comedy that is charmingly offensive in the hands of the two leads as it pokes fun at Belgium, Americans and racist midgets (although they prefer to be called dwarves) amongst others.

Farrell is perfectly cast as the juvenile Ray who is bored stiff in the Flemish city (albeit still tormented by the enormity of accidently killing a child during the hit) and he strikes a marvellous chemistry with Gleeson's more willing tourist Ken, catalysed by a superbly sharp witted script. The jokes are superb and the characters are so well forged that there are some truly touching moments between them towards the end. On the flip side there isn't a huge amount of plot to speak of and Fiennes' character is merely a watered down version of Sir Ben Kingsley's iconic role in 'Sexy Beast'. This can all be forgiven thanks to the consistent laughs and unique brand of morbid comedy that provides a welcome change to the standard Hollywood fare.

Verdict: Probably not for the easily offended but definitely for anyone with a good sense of humour, it's one that will grow and grow on you.


[REC]

Jaume Balguero's Spanish horror flick has been successful enough that not only has it secured a sequel but also an American remake, entitled 'Quarantine' which will be released later in the year. It utilises the (now surely exhausted) device of filming on handheld cameras, this time it's a news cameraman doing the filming and he is following television reporter Angela Vidal (Manuela Velasco). The news duo are following two fire-fighters for a night, when they are called out to an apartment building and a fireman and a policeman are viciously attacked the health authorities seal off the building with them and the residents trapped inside.

There was once a time when filming using a handheld camera would set your film apart from the crowd but there has now been a glut of such films and it would require something special to stand out from the crowd. '[REC]' doesn't really stand out but establishes itself as a solid example of the handheld-horror sub-genre. There are a good amount of scares and the tension is maintained throughout. Velasco's engaging reporter is the character we're supposed to root for and her endearing performance makes it hard not to, however there aren't any other character's developed enough to warrant a mention. The ending however is disappointing and the final shot almost laughable but it's short running time means that there's rarely a dull moment.

Verdict: It's fairly average and there's certainly nothing new on show but it's still a decent watch. For those who don't like subtitles, 'Quarantine' arrives in October.


SON OF RAMBOW
Fear not, this is not a spoof of Rambo, but the tale of two young boys who set about making a home movie sequel to 'Rambo: First Blood' and along the way forge an unlikely friendship. It's set in the glamorous location of Plymouth (circa the early 80's) and our protagonists come in the form of Will (Bill Milner) - a shy boy from a deeply religious family - and Lee Carter (Will Poulter) - the bad boy of his school but bullied by hid older brother. The two connect when Will (whose religion forbids him from watching television, listening to music etc) sees First Blood for the first time and his imagination runs away with him, Lee Carter borrows his brothers video camera and they set about making their own version.

The two boys as leads are fantastic, the performances are touching and their interaction together is fantastic. The way the two characters' relationship grows throughout the film is in no way artificial, they become friends without really realising and it is this friendship that underpins the entire movie. It's easy to scoff at the premise and ponder how sickeningly cheesy it may be, but upon viewing there thankfully isn't a whiff of this. So much credit must go to director Garth Jennings the story is based on his own childhood and one senses that this is how the youngsters are so easy to relate to. The scenes of the home movie being filmed are a hoot (the casting of Rambo a particular delight) with the humour glistening through even the more subdued scenes. And even the man himself Sly Stallone is a fan, calling it "heart-warming", now who can argue with that?

Verdict: A huge improvement for Jennings whose previous picture 'The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy' was very disappointing. Think 'Be Kind Rewind' but with a lot more heart and substance.